Espionage and Counterespionage
by QueenLydia
Summary: And this is why you should never bring dates home to the Brotherhood house.


"Is it on?"

"Yes, it's on," Pietro snapped, fumbling with his cell phone for another minute before finally giving a small nod of satisfaction and raising it towards the doorway.

"Guys, I'm not sure Lance's gonna be too happy about this..." Fred looked anxious as the four other members of the Brotherhood lurked outside the doorway to Lance's room and Pietro focused his phone's video recorder into their resident rockslider's room. To him, filming Lance and Kitty while they were alone in Lance's bedroom seemed like a bad idea to begin with, but Pietro and Tabby had insisted (Think of the potential for blackmail!")

Pietro snorted dismissively, shaking his head. "It's his own fault for doing it in such a public place anyhow."

"He's in his bedroom," Todd said blandly, his head sticking out from behind the doorframe as he watched the scene inside the next room. Quickly, Pietro grabbed him by the back of his collar and yanked him back before he could be seen.

"Yeah, but he left the door open," he replied, smirking as he focused his camera on the kissing couple inside. "It's fair game, Toad."

Toad peeked around the corner again, and winced. "How is he not hurting her thigh like that?"

"You really don't know anything about making out, do you?" Tabby frowned from her own spying perch on the other side of the doorframe. Todd pouted at her, resenting the allegation.

"Hey! I might be unexperienced now, but just give me a year or two! I will be an _expert_!"

"Sure, Toddles," Tabby replied, smirking, before turning her attention back to the kissing couple again.

"Guys," hissed Pietro, "shut up!" Inside the room, Lance could be hear moaning something in between kisses.

"Mmm... Kitty..."

"Oh my god." Tabby pressed a hand to her mouth to smother her snickers.

"And here we are observing the native mating call of the wild Avalanche..."

Todd smirked at Pietro's commentary before his face abruptly shiften into one of replusion at what he was seeing before him. "What's she doing now? Is she... _chewing _his _ear_?"

"Yup."

"Oh, nu-uh," he exclaimd, taking several steps backwards and nearly colliding with Fred. "This Toad don't do that. No way, no how."

"Why would you want someone to do that to you?" frowned Fred, trying to peek himself, but only managing to get in the way. Toad continued his observations from behind Tabitha.

"What's that? Is she tryin' to be a vampire or something? Why's she biting his neck?"

"Quiet!" hissed Tabitha. "We're trying to watch this!" Todd snorted and Tabby made a grab for him, but he quickly dashed across the doorway, nearly knocking down Pietro in his haste to hide behind Blob.

"Hey! You're jostling the camera! Knock it off!"

"Why are you two even here?" Tabitha narrowed her eyes. "Obviously you aren't emotionally mature enough to watch something as tender and emotional as this."

"_'Tender and emotional'_? They're chewin' on each other's faces, yo! And _you two_ are the ones who had the bright idea of spying on them in the first place!"

Tabby growled as Toad smirked at her, and then made another grab from him. "Hey- watch it!" exclaimed Pietro as he was knocked into yet again, the camera nearly falling from his hands as he lurched forward.

"Don't drop it!"

"I'm not!"

"Uhh... guys..." Freddy was staring inside the room, frowning nervously at whatever he was seeing. he was, of course ignored, both Pietro and Tabby at this point having been distracted by trying to catch Toad, who was leaping from the walls to the ceiling, evading them easily. He was ignored, that is, until...

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU MANIACS DOING?!"

"Oh my gosh, _get out_!" Kitty shrieked, nearly falling off the bed as Lance sprung away from her and began to pursue his spying housemates. The house began to shake slightly, and the four mutants outside the door froze in their tracks for a second, exchanging wide eyed glances, before they all wasted no time taking off.

_"Run!"_

"Move it, Freddy!" Tabby shouted, brushing past Fred as she raced for the safety of her own room and slammed the door behind her. Todd and Pietro both took off downstairs, and Blob wisely removed himself to his own bedroom, closing the door tightly behind him.

"PIETRO! TABBY!" Lance could still be heard howling even when all of his so called "friends" had long since vanished for safer ground. Kitty, still sitting on the bed, sighed and pressed a hand to her head. "Maybe we should just go to the mall from now on. It seems more... _private_."

**AN: I don't own X-Men: Evolution, or the wonderful Brotherhood. I also do not own that tape of Pietro's; you know, someone really ought to tell him that filming your best friend as he and his girlfriend are making out **_**really**_** isn't nice. Not that he would listen, but still...**

**Also, I know that the proper word is "inexperienced," instead of "unexperienced." It's just a Todd-ism.**

**BUT WAIT! There's more!**

"Smile, Pietro!" Lance exclaimed as the door to Pietro's bedroom suddenly burst open, revealing Lance standing in the doorway with a camera in hand. All three of the room's occupants were momentarily blinded by the sudden flash of the camera before one of Pietro's friends suddenly screamed and Pietro bolted out of bed.

"Lance, I'm gonna kill you, you sick sonofa- give that back! Gimme the camera- Lance! Lance!"

Abandoned in the bedroom, the two girls exchanged bewildered glances. Suddenly, the realized that some sort of lump was moving under the covers... a second before Toad popped up between them, grinning. "Hello, ladies!"

"Umm..." the brunette said, awkwardly shifting over in bed and reaching down to grab her dress off of the floor. "I think I'm going to go now..."

"Me too," the blonde girl agreed, and within seconds both girls were headed out the door, leaving Todd pouting in Pietro's bed.

"Aww, come on! That just ain't fair, man. A Toad just can't win these days..."

Oblivious to his party leaving through the backdoor, Pietro was still busy chasing Lance around the living room, Lance proving to be surprisingly nimble as he raced around the room, clutching the camera to his chest and laughing manically. "Revenge is sweet," he crowed, dodging around Pietro just as the speedster appeared in front of him. "Revenge is very, very sweet!"

**BONUS AN: Pietro had it coming.**


End file.
